It’s that time of year for giving, so sit right down and get ready for some comfy, cozy yuletide scares. From obvious classics to modern treats, enjoy this toasty mug of holiday horror!
Silent Night, Deadly Night (1984)
An absurdly offensive Christmas horror that pushes buttons for a good time.
Little Billy witnesses his parents being brutally murdered by Santa. Years later, when he has to fill in for an absent in-store Santa Claus, his childhood trauma materializes once again and sets him off on a murder spree.
The movie spends a surprisingly long amount of time examining just why Billy breaks down and becomes a murdering monster, which feeds really well into that moment when it comes.
Cheesy and messy it may be, but there’s a lot to admire about Charles E. Sellier Jr’s approach to holiday horror.
Santa’s Slay (2005)
There aren’t enough big dumb slashers with Bill Goldberg playing a rampaging, murderous Father Christmas. But at least there’s one!
Goldberg’s Santa is actually a demon who lost a bet with an angel and had to become a gift-giving institution as punishment. We join the story on the year the bet is finally off, and the introduction gives us a good example of the bloodshed to expect going forward with a surprise cameo from the late James Caan.
Gremlins (1984)
A deliciously mean-spirited family film? Joe Dante pulls it off with Gremlins. The adorable Gizmo and his leathery-skinned dark counterparts act as the barometer for the film’s switch from a warm and fuzzy festive movie to a dark-hearted comedic caper.
Spielberg by way of Dante is a winning festive formula, bringing B-movie charm to glossy small-town family drama.
Silent Night (2012/2021)
There are a few Christmas movies called Silent Night. Even John Woo made use of the moniker with an action movie this year. In horror, there are two in particular I’m throwing in here that have very different tones.
The first is 2012’s Silent Night, a loose remake of Silent Night, Deadly Night. Loose in the sense it shares about two or so scenes with the original. The big difference is there’s a greater intensity and seriousness about this version by Stephen C. Miller.
Then we have Camille Griffin’s 2021 Silent Night, which is a far cozier comedic affair at first, but it soon becomes clear that this family Christmas party we’ve been invited to is undercut with something horrifyingly ominous. Come for Keira Knightley, stay for the surprisingly bleak rug pull and its consequences.
Inside (2007)
Inside is not really about Christmas, you say? It’s about an unborn baby having to be protected from a murderous threat. There’s literally nothing more in the spirit of Christmas than that.
It does, of course, take place at Christmas, but probably not one to put on after your Turkey dinner.
Black Christmas (1974)
Mileage with the remakes may vary, but Bob Clark’s 1974 original is perhaps the most beautiful balance between shimmering Christmas decorations and a debased murder spree ever committed to screen.
Its tale of a sorority house hounded by a disturbing caller still makes for an uncomfortable watch to this day,
Better Watch Out (2016)
Halloween meets Home Alone makes Better Watch Out sound good on paper, but even that’s just a cover for what’s really going on in this movie.
A babysitter has to protect the twelve-year-old boy she’s looking after as masked invaders break into the house. What ensues is not only surprising but also brings us one of the most hateable horror villains of modern times.
Anna and the Apocalypse (2017)
The earworm soundtrack to this Christmas musical may fill you with joy, but Anna and the Apocalypse doesn’t exactly sugarcoat the ramifications of a zombie apocalypse in a small Scottish town.
Between the catchy choruses is a downbeat tale of needing to escape from drudgery and getting the monkey’s paw treatment as the undead spoil Christmas festivities.
Krampus (2015)
Michael Dougherty’s Krampus is the spiritual successor to Gremlins in a few ways, but it’s far more cynical and bleak in its view of the holidays.
Which is good, because it’s why the dysfunctional family gets a visit from Krampus in the first place, giving us a festive treat of mad puppets and killer gingerbread. If you ever want to set your kids straight on the spirit of Christmas, this film is a great reminder.
It’s a Wonderful Knife (2023)
Tyler MacIntyre may be essentially making a modern slasher alt of A Christmas Carol/It’s a Wonderful Life, but he and writer Michael Kennedy don’t forget to keep the warm heart of its influences involved.
A sweet sapphic twist on the ”I wish I’d never been born” story and a highly entertaining villainous turn by Justin Long make this cozy queer horror confection worth your time.
Dead End (2003)
Christmas Eve. On his way to his in-laws with his family, Frank Harrington (Ray Wise) decides to try a shortcut for the first time in 20 years. It turns out to be the biggest mistake of his life.
That’s the intriguing setup for the underseen Dead End by Jean-Baptiste Andrea and Fabrice Canepa. It heads down a somewhat predictable road, but the journey, fronted by Wise and horror stalwart Lin Shaye, is a gory mystery trip worth taking.
